a99kitten's Musings

So yesterday AM I took the buds to the beach. We started out on our regular route and then decided to go to Surfers Beach instead of the harbor beach at the last second. Bad decision.

On our way down the hill to the beach something happened. It’s a small hill. A small hill that I have navigated a gazillion times. It was still muddy from all the rain we’ve had. It’s always rocky. Both buds rushed down but they did not pull me but one was going one way, the other the other way. I don’t know what happened it was so fast. I fell. I felt my ankle/foot under me and it hurt. My knee and elbow hit the ground. I got up fast as I had to make sure the dog leashes were under control. As soon as I tried to stand I wanted to scream. I immediately sat down on a rock and was like “ok…I just need to rest it for a minute.” But I kinda already knew that was not the case.

The buds were both pretty cute. They immediately came over to where I was sitting and Angelus gave me little kisses in his worried way. I was like “OK, I can just walk down the beach slowly, it’ll be fine.” Thank Dog I did not try that. I would have been stuck further down the beach and then unable to walk. I sat there for like 5 minutes. The huskies were starting to get impatient! They clearly knew something was wrong with Mom and they were both whining a little. Angelus would walk around me, then come back and give me little kisses.

I got up and tried putting weight on my foot and no go. It hurt sooo bad. So now I’m like “how the heck am I getting back up the hill and home?” I knew husband was home. He was still sleeping when I left but he was also planning on leaving for Tahoe early. I tried his cell but no answer. Sigh. OK…I can do this. I get myself up and essentially half crawl up the hill. It hurt. A lot. By the time I got back up to the trail I was ready to fall down and stay there. But now we were next to Highway 1 so I had to think about the buds and making sure I had a good hold on their leashes.

I tried walking a bit more but it just hurt so bad. I tried husband again. Still no answer. A lady walking her small dog came up and asked if I was OK. I’m sure my limping, pained face, muddy pants and jacket were a bit of a give-a-way to a bit of distress. I said I had fallen and she asked if I needed her phone to call anyone. I told her I had one but my husband wasn’t answering so she said she’d call her husband who has a truck. I said sure. Me contemplating accepting help is a big deal. Especially from a stranger! Her husband wasn’t answering either (seriously men…what is the point of having a cell phone?) I told her that I should be OK and that I was just going to try and make it to the parking lot and wait for my husband. She looked doubtful. She said OK but that she would come back here and look for me after her walk.

I looked at the traffic, wondering how fast I could hobble across safely. There was a lull in southbound traffic and only 2 cars pretty far back northbound. So I went for it. Slowly. The truck coming northbound caught up with me and stopped traffic for me. So that was nice. I slowly hobbled across and just kept thinking “just keep it going, hold it together. The buds need me.” I got across and got down into the muddy parking lot. I stopped and rested for a second. I was sweating so much and starting to feel nauseous. I kept thinking “suck it up, make it home.” I tried my husband again. No answer. I was starting to get angry. Angry thinking he keeps that damn phone on all day and night, answering it even when we are out, or during the night so that even the text, Facebook update, news update dings wake me up during the night. But the one time it would be useful, no answer.

I walked (well…hobbled) half way across the parking lot and finally just sat down. I couldn’t keep going. I have never broken anything. I’ve never needed a cast/splint. I haven’t even sprained anything. Anytime I’ve tweaked an ankle or a knee doing stuff, I could always just walk it off. So being unable to go on my own power was not sitting well with me. So my pain and upset finally turned into me just about starting to almost cry as I sat there with my 2 dogs in the parking lot unable to move. I just kept thinking “Knock it off, suck it up, this isn’t helping you.” Just kept repeating it to myself so my wave of emotion would pass.

I tried my husband’s cell one more time and still no answer. I was so upset. A surfer girl in her truck stopped and asked me if I was OK. I said sure. I think I was so inside my own head at that point, I couldn’t really process her offer of help. I was thinking if I could make it to the fire station, they could help me the rest of the way. I tried husband’s cell one more time with no answer. I decided to try our home number. We never, ever answer our home phone. The only calls on it are sales/political calls. Friends and family call our cells. The machine picked up and I just kept yelling into it to wake up. Finally he picked up. I told him where I was and to come get us. Awesomely, after he got the dogs in and me, the first thing out of his mouth was how he was late leaving for Tahoe now. Really?

I got inside, got my shoes off and my ankle was the size of a baseball. That can’t be good. I butt-slid myself up the stairs and onto the sofa. My house is a tri-level. Many stairs….awesome. My foot and ankle were 1 big bundle of swollen pain. Husband kept asking me what happened, if it rolled in or out, did I hear a crack. I don’t know. I honestly couldn’t remember. It just happened.

Anyway, I got up this AM after an iffy night of sleep (having to stay on my back, with my leg elevated a bit over a pillow, snagging the blanket on my foot and hurting it – ow!) Around 7:30am I finally couldn’t stay in bed any longer, so I butt slid my way up the stairs to let the dogs into the front yard. Then I hobbled and hopped around the kitchen and got their breakfasts. Then hopped around and cleaned all the dishes up that were left in the sink and on the counter. I couldn’t let them sit there – bad patient. I tried putting pressure on my foot. The good news is the swelling has gone down a lot. Can see my little bones and tendons again in most spots. Yesterday it was one giant ball of swollen. I still can’t walk on it. From everything I read online yesterday, this is definitely pointing to a fracture. BUT, could still just be severe soft tissue damage. *fingers crossed* I can kinda hobble on it if I lean on something too and put all the pressure on my heel. But trying to walk on my foot heel to toe – notsomuch. And I can feel the pain more localized instead of a throbbing ball of ouch. It feels like it runs from the high ankle to my calf.

My doctor couldn’t see me yesterday afternoon. So I could go to Urgent Care or the ER. No thanks. So I am seeing how it feels by Monday and if still unable to walk on it – will go to the doctor. I hate the doctor. But at least the pain will be more localized and the doctor will be able to see what’s wrong easier. I have waaaaaaaay too much work to do next week. And my life is not conducive to not being able to run around a lot – at home, office, with the dogs. The huskies need their Mom very mobile!

So after picking up the kitchen, I hopped into the living room and am now sitting on the couch and watching Buffy on the Chiller channel. They are in the 2nd season and Angel is still on. A very good distraction :)