Had a really good night’s sleep. Odd. Especially since I was exhausted yesterday. Physically and mentally. I was truly ready for bed at around 7pm. And yet I stayed awake until around midnight. Woke up once while it was still dark, rolled over, back to sleep until like 6:30am.
Stayed busy and active all day. Sat down for like an hour all day. Well..plus sat on my Peloton. Made sure to stay busy. Do not think about anything other than getting crap done. And then did 5 miles on my Peloton and then a 2 hour afternoon walk.
Got home after walk, shoveled ice, did more inside stuff. Showered. Made dinner. Ate dinner. Sat down. Then cried. Of course I did. Saw a picture of Smokey. This is very hard. And not getting any better. I know I have gone thought this before. Several times. Differently, but the same. Yet this feel different..maybe since I am all alone.
And now it is the weekend again so I do not have the markets to waste time and brain power on. Last week I had a “busy” social calendar – invited to dinner Wed night, Sun night, Mon night. Kept my brain busy at least.
But no..not really getting any better. I can only stay moving for so many hours per day. Every night I say I am going to curl up and stay in bed the next day. Every morning I do not. One of these will break soon.
