{"id":1071,"date":"2009-09-01T14:16:31","date_gmt":"2009-09-01T21:16:31","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/a99kitten.com\/?p=1071"},"modified":"2009-09-01T14:16:31","modified_gmt":"2009-09-01T21:16:31","slug":"a-dc-airport-ticket-agent-offers-some-examples-of-why-our-country-is-in-trouble","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/a99kitten.com\/?p=1071","title":{"rendered":"A DC airport ticket agent offers some examples of &#8216;why&#8217; our country is in trouble!"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>I received this joke via email. I have no idea if any of them are true but it actually wouldn&#8217;t surprise me as I have heard the kind of questions people ask and have less than zero faith that any of our politicians possess a working brain&#8230;<\/p>\n<p>Plus they made me giggle :)<\/p>\n<p><em><br \/>\n&#8220;A DC airport ticket agent offers some examples of &#8216;why&#8217; our country is in trouble!<br \/>\n<\/em><br \/>\n1.I had a New Hampshire Congresswoman (Carol Shea-Porter) ask for an aisle seat so that her hair wouldn&#8217;t get messed up by being near the window. (On an airplane!)<\/p>\n<p>2.I got a call from a Kansas Congressman&#8217;s (Moore) staffer (Howard Bauleke), who wanted to go to Capetown. I started to explain the length of the flight and the passport information, and then he interrupted me with, &#8221;I&#8217;m not trying to make you look stupid, but Capetown is in Massachusetts .&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>Without trying to make him look stupid, I calmly explained, &#8221;Cape Cod is in Massachusetts , Capetown is in Africa &#8221;<\/p>\n<p>his response &#8212; click.<\/p>\n<p>3. A senior Vermont Congressman (Bernie Sanders) called, furious about a Florida package we did. I asked what was wrong with the vacation in Orlando. He said he was expecting an ocean-view room. I tried to explain that&#8217;s not possible, since Orlando is in the middle of the state.<\/p>\n<p>He replied, &#8216;don&#8217;t lie to me, I looked on the map and Florida is a very thin state!&#8221; (OMG)<\/p>\n<p>4. I got a call from a lawmaker&#8217;s wife (Landra Reid) who asked, &#8221;Is it possible to see England from Canada ?&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>I said, &#8221;No.&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>She said, &#8221;But they look so close on the map.&#8221; (OMG, again!)<\/p>\n<p>5.An aide for a cabinet member (Janet Napolitano) once called and asked if he could rent a car in Dallas . I pulled up the reservation and noticed he had only a 1-hour layover in Dallas . When I asked him why he wanted to rent a car, he said, &#8221;I heard Dallas was a big airport, and we will need a car to drive between gates to save time.&#8221; (Aghhhh)<\/p>\n<p>6.An Illinois Congresswoman (Jan Schakowsky) called last week. She needed to know how it was possible that her flight from Detroit left at 8:30 a.m., and got to Chicago at 8:33 a.m.<\/p>\n<p>I explained that Michigan was an hour ahead of Illinois , but she couldn&#8217;t understand the concept of time zones. Finally, I told her the plane went fast, and she bought that.<\/p>\n<p>7. A New York lawmaker, (Jerrold Nadler) called and asked, &#8221;Do airlines put your physical description on your bag so they know whose luggage belongs to whom?&#8221; I said, &#8216;No, why do you ask?&#8217;<\/p>\n<p>he replied, &#8221;Well, when I checked in with the airline, they put a tag on my luggage that said (FAT), and I&#8217;m overweight. I think that&#8217;s very rude!&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>After putting him on hold for a minute, while I looked into it. (I was dying laughing). I came back and explained the city code for Fresno , Ca. is (FAT &#8211; Fresno Air Terminal), and the airline was just putting a destination tag on his luggage.<\/p>\n<p>8. A Senator John Kerry aide (Lindsay Ross) called to inquire about a trip package to Hawaii . After going over all the cost info, she asked, &#8221;Would it be cheaper to fly to California and then take the train to Hawaii ?&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>9. I just got off the phone with a freshman Congressman, Bobby Bright (D) from Ala who asked, &#8221;How do I know which plane to get on?&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>I asked him what exactly he meant, to which he replied, &#8221;I was told my flight number is 823, but none of these planes have numbers on them.&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>10. Senator Dianne Feinstein (D) called and said, &#8221;I need to fly to Pepsi-Cola , Florida . Do I have to get on one of those little computer planes?&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>I asked if she meant fly to Pensacola , FL on a commuter plane.<\/p>\n<p>She said, &#8221;Yeah, whatever, smarty!&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>11. Mary Landrieu (D) La. Senator called and had a question about the documents she needed in order to fly to China . After a lengthy discussion about passports, I reminded her that she needed a visa. &#8216;Oh, no I don&#8217;t. I&#8217;ve been to China many times and never had to have one of those.&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>I double checked and sure enough, her stay required a visa. When I told her this she said, &#8221;Look, I&#8217;ve been to China four times and every time they have accepted my American Express!&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>12. A New Jersey Congressman (John Adler) called to make reservations, &#8221;I want to go from Chicago to Rhino, New York .&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>I was at a loss for words. Finally, I said, &#8221;Are you sure that&#8217;s the name of the town?&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>&#8216;Yes, what flights do you have?&#8221; replied the man.<\/p>\n<p>After some searching, I came back with, &#8221;I&#8217;m sorry, sir, I&#8217;ve looked up every airport code in the country and can&#8217;t find a rhino anywhere.&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>&#8221;The man retorted, &#8221;Oh, don&#8217;t be silly! Everyone knows where it is. Check your map!&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>So I scoured a map of the state of New York and finally offered, &#8221;You don&#8217;t mean Buffalo , do you?&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>The reply? &#8221;Whatever! I knew it was a big animal.&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>Now you know why the Government is in the shape that it&#8217;s in! Could anyone be this DUMB? YES, THEY WALK AMONG US, ARE IN POLITICS, AND THEY CONTINUE TO BREED.<\/p>\n<p>I don&#8217;t write it, I just offer it for your consideration. Like manure, you just gotta spread it around. &#8220;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>I received this joke via email. I have no idea if any of them are true but it actually wouldn&#8217;t surprise me as I have heard the kind of questions people ask and have less than zero faith that any of our politicians possess a working brain&#8230; Plus they made me giggle :) &#8220;A DC [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[93,249],"tags":[522],"class_list":["post-1071","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-funny","category-politics","tag-a-dc-airport-ticket-agent-offers-some-examples-of-why-our-country-is-in-trouble"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/a99kitten.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1071","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/a99kitten.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/a99kitten.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/a99kitten.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/a99kitten.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=1071"}],"version-history":[{"count":4,"href":"https:\/\/a99kitten.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1071\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":1075,"href":"https:\/\/a99kitten.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1071\/revisions\/1075"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/a99kitten.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=1071"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/a99kitten.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=1071"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/a99kitten.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=1071"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}